Saturday, April 14, 2012

My comfort zone

I didn't realize until today when I signed on here how much better I feel when I'm on here reading about what's going on with all of you and talking through our struggles.  Lately I haven't been happy at all.  Well, like I'm happy sometimes, but only because I force myself to put on a front.  But ultimately, I'm not.  I feel like I'm stuck where I am and I can't get out.  I feel trapped and I have no freedom.  This bothers me because I feel like it will never change.  It can't change... but it's ultimately because of a choice I made.  They say everything gets better or everything can be fixed.  This is not true.  There are certain decisions that you can make in life that are permanent and you can't change them. To be honest, I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to do this.  I feel like giving up because I'm tired of fighting....it really does feel hopeless to me.  I'm sorry this post is so depressing and I hope everyone else is doing a lot better then I am.

4 comments:

  1. Hope you an cheer up soon. Nice to see a post from you. Things CAN get better. You have to believe that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I know the feeling of knowing that things can change or get better but just that you really couldn't be arsed to fight anymore. I get that. Stay strong little flower. It will be okay in the end one way or another. Xo

    ReplyDelete
  3. What's going on? is there anything I can do to help you get out of the gloom? Hang in there and don't give up please. I care for you.
    You're a wonderful person and friend. <3

    ReplyDelete
  4. i know how you feel about putting on a front and hardly ever feeling truly happy. Sometimes you have to find one thing and focus on it and it helps. It really helps.
    Cheer up and think bright thoughts. Things will get better. You may just have to make them get better.
    xox

    ReplyDelete